1. Your daughter wants to shack up with a character named Pikachu.

Inevitably, your kids are going to demand licensed character bedding.
We think, however, that a kid's room should be a peaceful respite from the
outside world. Our advice? Just say "Po." Whoops, make that "No".

2. Your kids think that the phrase "clean up your room" is slang for "ignore
mommy".

The best way to keep your kid's room clean is to invest in plenty of
storage. That way your kids can watch you clean up more quickly than ever
before.

3. Toilet tissue isn't available in the same pattern as your daughter's
bedding.

Matching everything in your kid's room makes it look really boring.
Matching everything in your kid's room makes it look really boring.
Matching everything in your kid's room makes it look really boring.
Matching everything in your kid's room makes it look really boring.

4. Keeping your kid's room from resembling Greg's pad after he took over the
attic in The Brady Bunch.

There's a fine line between getting your kid involved in decorating his room
and letting him make all of the choices. The fact is, you're paying for the
stuff. So it's up to you to make sure your kid doesn't outgrow the room.
Groovy?

5. Being able to recite the following mantra: I will not do a race car or
princess theme. I will not do a race car or princess theme. I will not do
a race car or princess theme.

Believe it or not, your parent's license will not be revoked if you don't do
a theme in your kid's room. While choosing a theme is an easy answer, it's
not a good one. Kids outgrow themes like clothes. And then all you're left
with is an ugly plastic racing car bed that you can't figure out how to fit
into the recycling bin.

6. Figuring out where to put the 8 x 10 "I love Grandpa" picture frame your
daughter received for her birthday.

Okay, so you're trying to keep your kid's room sophisticated and tasteful.
Problem is, Grandpa Milty doesn't quite get understatement. What to do? Put
the frame up when Grandpa visits. Shove it in the drawer when he leaves.

7. After spending thousands of dollars and waiting months for your
furniture, your kid decides he doesn't like the shadows the bed projects on
the wall.

Kids are unpredictable. One day they love something. The next day it's
creeping them out. We solve this problem by offering a satisfaction
guaranteed return policy.

8. Your kids don't understand the difference between making their bed and
making in their bed.

Always buy extra sheets so you'll have enough on hand in case of emergency.
(That's our number one advice.)

9. After making your kid's room look so good, "go to your room" may cease to
be an effective punishment.

Once you redecorate, your punishment arsenal may indeed be reduced. But,
hey, you still have the trusty "timeout" in your back pocket.

10. Retailers that think it's cute to write a backward letter "s" whenever
they use the word "kids" in their advertising.

And another thing. Shouldn't "Toys-R-Us" be "Toys-Are-We?"